dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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