Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
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I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
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i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
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