She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I understand Curling. That high.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
