what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
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