Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
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