Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
