I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Please don't give away my fajitas
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