I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
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