is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Randomize
