even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
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