the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize