Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
and you fell through a lawn chair
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
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