The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
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