You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
