Banned from zoo.
Again?
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Randomize
