What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
