But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
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