I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize