Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
