I molested 6 butterflies tonight
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Randomize
