this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
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