He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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