Banned from zoo.
Again?
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
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