I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Randomize