New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
My breath smells like gin and sadness
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
