Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Randomize