glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
