No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
