oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
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