Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
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