i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize