I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
Randomize