worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize