It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
