i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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