dude i'm inner monologue high
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
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