I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
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