That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
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