her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
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