so explain again why im purple
no
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
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