I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
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