So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize
