A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
