i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
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Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo