Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
