I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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