So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
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