Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
