No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
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