Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Randomize
